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I come from a very small
town in Ohio. Yes, that's right, I am an out-of-state student. Like every
other person I tell this to, you must be asking yourself why I am I going
to Grand Valley. Who cares? I'm here so get used to it. Anyway, Findlay (my
small town in Ohio), is really far away from any big city. So, it is no surprise
that my first visit to Grand Rapids was a hectic one. I mean there is so much
here that I dont have in Findlay, like hobos and night clubs, but the thing
I found the most aggravating was the bus system. Don't worry, Im not going
to bore you by telling you all of the stupid stuff I have done (although if
you want me to, I could), but instead I am going to give you some valuable
advice: You are always cooler than elementary school kids. Always. My roommate
and I made our first trip to the mall, and on our way back we started talking
to some 5th or 6th graders.
Mainly we talked about where we need to get off to catch
the next bus, but that is not the point. Before we talked to the four girls,
we were listening to their rather intense conversation. Allow me to fill you
in on their situation. You see Jessica and Brian have been dating for, like,
three months now. Jessica always liked Brian but never said anything, but
after Brian broke up with Sarah after school one day, Alice (Jessica's friend)
told Brian that Jessica liked him. Well sure enough, Brian, being the player
that he is, started going out with Jessica and ever since then they have
been happy. Not so fast there! Apparently, yesterday Brian sat with that
cheap slut Sarah at lunch and he didn't say one word to Jessica yesterday
or today....That's it. That was the end of the problem.
Can you believe we used to be that young and naive?
I started to chuckle to myself about the way kids can have these really insignificant
relationships, but they try their hardest to make them sound grown-up. I guess
they best accomplish this by saying the simple phrase "goin' out". Thats
all it takes. When you hear a kid say, "Yeah me and Jake are goin out," they
dont mean that they will be meeting for a date this Friday at Burger King.
No, of course not, all it means is that one of them handed the other one
a note that said, "Do you like me? Circle YES or No." If they circle YES,
then you are officially now "goin out". The truth is, it doesnt matter if
they circle YES or No, they will never see each other outside of school, with
the exception of the football game here and there.
How I wish I could be in a relationship like that now.
I don't mean that I want to be in a relationship with a 5th grader,
just in a relationship with that state of mind. Think about it. I would never
have to meet her parents or pay for her dinner. All I would have to do is
hold her hand when we watch that movie in Social Studies and after a month
kiss her after Math class. Instant relationship...no...the perfect
relationship! Its like all of the love without having to spoon afterwards.
Man, I am so much cooler than 5th graders.